CATEGORY: Sonnet Bookmark and Share



Frozen




Frozen



The latent pace of winter-tide drifts on,


hibernal winds exhale a frosty dawn,


the gentle warmth of summer’s long-since gone,


now ‘midst the jagged ice the sun lies torn.


 


Of broken heart she bleeds, to frigid pools,


a weary spectral light for life to take;


ethereal displays of winter jew’ls


reflect her soul on tears of downy flake.


 


Emotion spent she falls to deep repose,


where afternoon dies young, bereft of light,


‘cept for a moonlight serenade that flows


across the down that softly quilts the night.


 


Encased within her dreams of grief and pain,


a frozen world of beauty breathes in vain.



by bluemoon (Viewed 133 times)

You must log-on in order to critique and grade any writings. Login here.


Other Critiques of this Work
Given By: raenie
Critique Date:02/21/2010

Critique:Hi Sharon :) wow--this is another of your "wow" sonnets :) So glad to read another one of your masterpieces here--reading this is like a lovely yet bittersweet painting--I really like how you incorporate personification in the tale of your sonnet, it really makes for a more interesting read, a different layer that adds more meaning to it--I do think you've mastered this, especially since your last couplet always seems to be the perfect ending to your sonnet :) thanks again for sharing this :) I think when I do experience snow, I'd be thinking of this sonnet of yours...
[View Replies]

Grade:Excellent


Given By: kuirq
Critique Date:02/21/2010

Critique:As with your other sonnets, I love the imagery you came up with. I think the touch of melancholy gives it a certain enchanting appeal to it. Come to think of it, I suppose that's what makes your words stand out. Somehow you are always able to give beauty to something that would have been otherwise deemed as just tragic or sad. My only comment is that I have to get used to the abbreviated words--the apostrophes to denote the shortened words sort of distracted me--, I admit I had to read it out loud a couple of times before I got into the flow of it, sort of put myself in a certain (I'm not sure...old English?) mode. Aside from that, I enjoyed the read. Thanks for sharing this Sharon, you've given winter a (sad but lovely) personality and soul .
[View Replies]

Grade:Excellent


Given By: Dennis
Critique Date:02/21/2010

Critique:I have read your sonnet at least twenty times and each time I enjoy it more. Your ability of how you can use words overwhelms me. Just beatiful!
[View Replies]

Grade:Excellent


 
One-Stop Write Shop LLC Copyright 2007-2008
visitors since November 2007!
1279 total writings, and growing!
Designed by Developjet
Members Only
Writers Station
Logon
User Action Menu View Portfolio View Public Profile View Blog Send Private Message
User Action Menu View Portfolio View Public Profile View Blog Send Private Message
User Action Menu View Portfolio View Public Profile View Blog Send Private Message